In the midst of COVID-19, I have taken a hard look at my own family’s mental health. As much as I am a very optimistic person, I know the pandemic has created some stress in my body. As much as my children don’t say much about how COVID has impacted them, I know deep down that they worried too. To cope with the stress we all have, I have some personal tips to share. They seem to work pretty well with my own family and me. As most experts would agree, you may not be able to control the worrying situation, but you can control how you respond to it!
- The practice of mindfulness: Mindfulness is a state of being where one pays full attention to the moment to moment activity. The practice mindfulness is not limited to meditation; it can also be paying attention to moment -to moment activities such as setting the table, brushing teeth, or making the bed. I tend to find when I focus on the present moment, my worry goes away, and I live a more fulfilled life.
- Ritual: Working in the mental health field, I understand the importance of routine and structure. I think having a routine not only works well with children and people dealing with a mental disability; for everyone else, having a routine gives us a sense of control and structure, which then helps reduce anxiety. For my family during the past few months, we have been taking an evening walk every day. My kids know that when the clock strikes six, it is time to put on the shoes to go out. After the walk, our body tends to be more relaxed, and it also helps to reduce anxiety. I have also requested my kids to make their beds and clean their rooms every morning. The reason I gave them is, “If you had a very bad day, but seeing a clean bed and a clean room would make you feel better.” A clean and organized house also feeds into a sense of control over our living environment and lives.
- The power of positivity: One thing that helps to deal with stress in my own personal life is “positivity.” I surround myself with positive people and minimize negative conversations with others. I also try to focus on positive emotions such as gratitude, humor, kindness, and humility. While my children may feel sad that they cannot go to school or see their friends, I try to remind them of the things they need to be grateful for such as shelter and food. Having had to deal with many challenges in life, I think we all have developed an appreciation for these positive emotions and understand how they uplift us while negative emotions such as hatred, resentment, self-blame spiral us down!
- Taking Action: Recognizing the negative thought and try to reframe it into a positive has worked really well in me. But another thing has also helped is doing something about it. It is simply what my grandma would say ” Stop fretting; just deal with it!” If things are out of our control, rather than push the worry away, invite the “worry” for a conversation! One can do that by writing the worries down and pen down any necessary thoughts or actions. Writing down lists of “pros” and “cons” and possible solutions can be more productive and empowering, than simply worrying in the head and do nothing about it. Sometimes the worry has no perfect solution. But be able to accept it, have a plan for it, and move forward with it is better than always thinking about it.
- Cleaning: There are two other things I like to do when I am worried. One is exercising and the other is, cleaning. I think there are enough articles written that talk about how physical activity helps boost one’s mood. But I personally have found cleaning the house or organizing my cabinets to be quite therapeutic. As I am cleaning, it works almost like cleansing my soul and calming my emotions. Sometimes, a light bulb might just come up and turn a mundane task into streams of inspiration! A word of caution though, if cleaning, is becoming an overwhelming task, set a smaller goal so that you feel more accomplished.
I am not a mental health professional. But I do work with many highly trained professionals. My colleagues have shared with their field of expertise over the years. The tips I have provided here, however, are for reference only. If you are dealing with extreme anxiety or other mental health issues, it is best to consult a professional for help! Turn your worries into triumphs. Good luck!
